Don't Be Afraid to Go Alone

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There is so much peace in spending time alone.  I do love spending time and catching up with loved ones, but there is something so special about being with just the three amigos: me, myself, and I.  Naturally, I am an introvert so this comes easily.  Think about all of the hours in a day, week, or even a month, that you spend around other people for an hour or more.  Our daily activities like school, work, family and friend engagements, church, and social events keep us in close quarters with others.  So it is imperative that we make room for a little me time to reset our energy.  

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Have you ever had one of those days where you are restless, and you just want to get out of the house?  That was me a few weeks ago. I was about to dial up someone to accompany me, and I stopped in my tracks.  I thought to myself, when was the last time you did something by yourself?  It had been a minute and since my plans for that day had already been cancelled, I set out to explore the city alone.  

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So I drove downtown, and parked my car in a garage and started walking.  The QLine, an electric train publicly transporting Detroiter's north and south along Woodward Ave, is finally up and running so I  walked to the end (or beginning) at Jefferson Ave and waited for it to arrive.  I boarded and rode it just past where I parked, and got off.  I walked a little while longer trying to decide where I wanted to eat and ended up dining at a local restaurant/bar.  

When I walked in, it was ghost town.  Nobody was in there except me and the staff, so the service was fast and friendly.  I sat down at the bar and ordered some wings, crab cakes, and a salad from the happy hour menu.  By the time my Amaretto Sour arrived, the DJ had started playing music.  I dined alone with just me, myself, and my thoughts as I vibed to the music.  This is what peace feels like.

I think that some people are afraid to be by themselves, or are worried about how it may look to others.  I just don't care.  I personally enjoy going to the movies, shopping, out to eat, events, the gym, and Netflix and chilling... alone.  A few years back I went to an event alone, and because I didn't have any familiar faces to talk to, I was forced to network with others.  This ultimately led me to my position as a content creator for the Michigan Chronicle Online.  NEWSFLASH: you don't always need a plus one, two, or three.  In an article on Psychology Today titled 6 Reasons You Should Spend More Time Aloneit states that we live in a culture tends to equate a desire for solitude with people who are lonely, sad, or have antisocial tendencies, when that is certainly not the case.  The article goes on to state the benefits of seeking solitude include improving concentration, increasing productivity, and that it may even enhance the quality of your relationships. 

If you don't spend time by yourself, how will you know what you really like, or what really excites and interests you?  I like doing things alone because I don't have to wait on anyone but myself, I don't have to agree on what I want to do, and when I'm ready to go, I can go!  Of course, there is the element of safety, which is why you should always use your best judgement before going to certain places alone. Also, don't think that you have to go somewhere to be alone.  Another thing that I like to do to spend time by myself is journal or read a book.  It's as simple as cutting off the television, putting the phone on do not disturb, lighting my favorite candle, and getting lost in the pages.  This is also an ideal set up for meditating or praying.  

So my friend, I said all of that to say: don't be afraid to go alone. You'll thank yourself for it, later. 

Let's Talk:

How do you spend time alone?

♡, Antoinette